We have our own stories to tell when it comes to our journey to parenthood. My mother had her own stories about us growing up and her struggles too.
Now, that I have my own toddler to guide, I can’t help but wonder, is parenting harder these days?
My parents and I had a discussion about drinking water. Babies below 6 months should not drink water. And I strictly told them not to give any water to Ellie even when she got hiccups! No matter what happens, NO water for her. The reason behind this ( I read in a parenting article) is for her to absorb all of the proper nutrients from the milk (calcium and other healthy stuff). My dad and mom protested. ” YOU had water after milk when you’re a baby and you’re just fine.” Well yeah. They have a point. But I argued with them that right now, lots of studies came out and most of the parenting ways long ago,were wrong. Oops I didn’t mean to offend them. It is just that this is the way that we want for Ellie, so please bear with me.
CHOICES.CHOICES.and more CHOICES.
Having a child is a choice. Raising kids is hard today because of different parenting philosophies, health guidelines, educational options, and more. It is not just about having a baby and guiding them and raising them as healthy and literate individual. I am writing this based on my experience. From the day that I got a positive result and found out that we’re going to have a baby is not just about it. But from day one, it is more of choices, choices and more choices.
What to eat and avoid during pregnancy, normal delivery or c-section,induced or not? with epidural or not? Should we let our baby cry herself to sleep, how to potty-train her, at what age she should enter kindergarten, whether and how to pass on our religious faith to her, at what age she can stay home alone, how much time she should spend watching Eva Elly and the ABC songs etc. Honestly – I am burning half of my energy thinking about different choices and sometimes I still resort to the ways that I was raised as a child.
Today we are given multiple choices and it means making decisions are harder to make than they were for previous generations. My mother told me that I always know what is right and wrong for my kid. No matter what books I read or whatever advices other moms or forums gave me I am still her best choice. We need to simply realize that most parents really are trying to do what’s best for their kids (like me), and to extend a little more grace and space to the parents who raise their kids differently than how I raise mine. Like a quote says :
“Parenthood is not a battle with other parents.Parenthood is your journey with your children”.