on mom wars and other online hating-bashing-crazy stuff.

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WARNING: Long post full of emotions.

Hello there! I am a mother – of one, as of this time. :) Motherhood opens new doors and widens my perspective when it comes to different aspects of life in general. I used to have a very active social media / online life but things changed when I became a mother. I joined mommy groups, breastfeeding advocates online and even cloth diapering groups etc. Basically, these online groups have their own beliefs when it comes to what they are promoting and from there I was able to read how opinions clashes and were brought down to a personal level of bashing and hating, unfortunately, to fellow moms too.

Why is it hard for a mother to support another mother in her journey to motherhood? Why is it so easy for us to hate someone who doesn’t practice same ways and beliefs?

I always write the phrase ” to each his own”. As a mother, we know what’s better for our family and what’s best for our kids. We might see what’s happening and it’s so easy for us to judge based on what we see BUT do we really know what’s really really happening?

We all have our preferences when it comes to brands, traditions to practice, books to read and instructions to follow. There are instances that the choices we made can make other individuals frown or cringe but let’s make them irrelevant by ignoring them although as a mother when it comes to our family especially our adorable kids… I know that we will never (ever) back down.

So here’s my message for those not-so-busy-individuals-out-there-who-loves-to-hate.

You’re wasting your time hating a happy picture of another individual’s family. You cannot be like them and definitely, they will not be like you. You might say that you don’t want to be like them but are you sure that they want to be like you? Hating another mother or an individual won’t make you a good one. Saying something bad about someone’s kid will not have a good ending no matter how hard you explain that you blurted that out in good faith. If you cannot say anything positive or kind, just shut up.

And for those unsolicited pieces of advice from people who is not even a mother or a wife even, how did you know? You cannot give an opinion on something you haven’t experienced yourself. This is not mathematics that you learned from school, this is life happening and if you’re not being asked to give your opinion – then don’t.

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For mothers who love to hate other moms and would die to give their mothering tips and tricks, please…let other mothers be the mothers that they want to be. Yes, you’re good at being a mom and balancing career, family and online life are your forte but all moms are different. They are designed based on what kind of family and kids they have. So please let’s support each other to create our own stories about our own families and motherhood journeys.

Hating is very easy but why should we waste our life looking at the bad side, create unhappy memories and gather all the negative energies available on Earth? Seriously if you find yourself looking at other people’s business and you’re beginning to harbor hate in your hearts… then it’s time to assess your life and start focusing on improving your own. The grass will always be greener on the other side…. not unless you start watering your own garden instead of worrying and looking at others backyard.

Spread the love.

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2 Comments Add yours

  1. The whole “mommy wars” thing really sucks! I have been on the receiving end of this, and I have also witnessed it happen to others. It’s so sad that we all have mothering in common, yet some would rather alienate than appreciate.

    Liked by 1 person

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