Conversation with Ellie

Okay. Ellie is one. She knows how to walk and pretty much do the same things other toddlers can do. Milestones ? check.

I just recently post about how frustrating it is to spend just a few hours with her during weekdays. It is still frustrating – nothing changed. As I think about it, ever since she learned how to walk and grab things, we have repetitive conversations at home. Well, technically I am just the one talking, she is just giving me the “look” and babbles and dance moves and laughs.

Ellie: **babbles and giggles**

Me: Hi baby! what did you do today? Did you eat? Did you read your books?

Ellie: **babbles and squirms**

As soon as I put her down…

“Baby careful!”

“Noooo! Don’t touch that!”

“Ellie don’t eat mommy’s phone”

**She drops the phone and walks around the house again**

“Noooo! Ellie!!!”

**drops the remote**

“Slowly Ellie… don’t go there.”

**pulled the chair**

“Daddy is here don’t go to the kitchen.”

**peeks through the curtains**

“Mr. Sun is sleeping. “

“Don’t bite that.”

“Diaper change!”

“Milk time :) “

“Don’t go down the bed.”

**went down the bed and head straight towards the cabinets**

“Come here, love.”

“Do you want to read?”

**babbles and laughs**

“Just choose one.”

**drops all the books from the shelf**

“Please.”

“Ellie, milk time.”

**carry her to bed**

“Where’s mommy?” ( I am hiding under the covers)

“Please sleep now.” 

“Where’s mommy?” ( I am hiding under the covers)

“Sleeping time!”

**lights off**

“Ellie…finish drinking your milk…” 

“aww baby… sleep now. good night”

Sometimes I am guilty of sleeping before she does. But as soon as I doze off she’ll be snoring too after five or 10 more minutes.

Exhausting? yes. This is part of toddlerhood and I know that this will not last long and I know that I am going to miss these days just like how I miss her during her fragile baby days. Funny how I remember that I cannot wait for her to crawl and walk and just like that here she is. Time flies so fast that I feel like I being left out. I want to cherish every single moment. Tired? definitely. But I cannot repeat these moments and it is fleeting. I always think about it that way. My time with her and whatever activities that we are doing will end sooner than what I expect. No matter how hard I try to stop time or make it slow – I can’t. We can’t.

For the mean time, this will be our bonding moment. Tomorrow is another story.

Happy 14th month Ellie! :)

There’s an unexplainable joy in being a mother. Those little kisses and sweet random hugs from Ellie completes my (our) day.Now that she is starting to learn more things and do more stuff I cannot contain THAT feeling.

I used to check out other babies and their milestones just to triple check if Ellie is also doing the same or if she’s doing better. I know it’s not right to compare but I cannot help it. I know that I am not the only one guilty of this. As a mother, I have my own set of worries and victories – some of them are what other parents have… but most of them are our achievements as parents and as a family.

Today is her 14th month. Aside from walking around the house and climbing here and there and exploring whatever her hands touches, Ellie is also interested in books, musical instruments, and her bunny stuff toy (aka dirty bunny). She can now say – A – B – C. And refers to everyone as MAMA. It’s cute how she looks at me and babble, trying her best to communicate. Sorry, it’s not cute – it is priceless. I know that sooner or later she will no longer do that. Give this to me..let me savor this. :)

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Seeing our little princess development from day one and how she changed from a fragile baby to a walking doll 14 months later is one of my many victories.I know that soon enough I’ll be posting more about her achievements and my rants and worries and success as a parent.

What’s your favorite moment with your kid? :)

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I have my own walking doll.

At 13 months, Ellie completely turned into a walking doll. Literally walking – all day every day. She will take her naps and as soon as she opens her eyes… she will go down the bed and walk and walk and walk. My mom told me that since this is her new skill – exploring around is one of her daily tasks aside from drinking her milk and sleeping.

I can still remember the day when she made her first few (unguided) steps. It was like witnessing a magical moment. I wanted her to repeat it all over again but it can no longer be repeated. I am just glad that I was there to see it with my own eyes. The happiness I felt that time is unexplainable like the milestone was for me to own.

Ellie is changing day by day. I told my hubby that I was looking at her photos and there’s a pinch in my heart when I saw the changes. From a tiny fragile baby she is now a kulilit walking doll.

The Journey to Toddlerhood Begins with a Single Step.

Ellie is officially walking. We are not posting anything about her walking escapades not until she is walking properly. She is like an energizer (baby) bunny nowadays. Non-stop walking. We are happy to know and see her growing up healthy and active.

We are extra happy when we witnessed her first (four) steps plus her dance moves. She walks fast it seems like she wants to learn running first before walking :)

As a mom  – I usually worry about her milestones and achievement unlocked moments. I keep on researching and reading about baby’s growth and development. I keep on asking my friends about their toddler stories and what they did etc.

There are still a lot of milestones to unlock for Ellie. Sometimes I wonder if reading too much helps or makes me worry more. My mom told me that every child has its own pace. So I should not worry about Ellie because she’s just on time.  As a mother – I always want the best for her (I’m sure other moms too.

Her journey started – soon enough she will try to be a grown up and become independent. Ooops I am not ready for that yet. I know I will be a clingy stage mommy.

Her journey to toddlerhood is another path for us to take. From the moment that she made her first step – I know I will be a clingy stage mommy.

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Mommy thoughts today.

The weekend is over. Here I am sitting in my office cubicle and thinking about the weekend that was. I woke up at 530AM last Saturday. I woke up sad and teary because I thought it was Sunday. I find myself amusing most of the time. I sent a message to my husband and told him about what happened.

I read the whole week about toddler nutrition. I got paranoid and told my husband that I need to give Ellie more vegetables and fruits. Check her calorie intake and even make sure that she is given the right amount as indicated by the FOOD PYRAMID. I was even tempted to go ORGANIC ( I have nothing bad to say about Organic lovers it’s just that it is not for me). I went to the grocery and bought beetroot, oats, banana, wheat bread, yogurt. That was my weekend plan  – work on her meals. But I will save this meal stuff for another post. 

I spent the whole day taking care of our toddler who amazingly wants to walk on her own – but cannot. There are many failed attempts and I find it funny. Before we wanted her to crawl. We did everything to make her. And when she finally crawled we wanted her to stop. And now, the walking part.

Ellie now knows how to go down on the sofa and our bed. There are mini heart attacks every time. I wonder what will happen to me when she becomes a teenager. Motherhood – I always painted it in pastel colors – smooth, light and breezy. Now that she is starting to bump her head on corners, get bruises and scratches I am starting to think twice. This is the real thing now. Surviving every single day making sure that Ellie will survive her day too.

I have my weaknesses as a mom, I am not perfect and definitely not great. Motherhood is not what I picture it is. It is not a milk or diaper commercial. It is messy. The milk will spill and Ellie will keep on moving while I change her diaper, unlike those TVCs where the mom is smiling and the baby smiling back while they were dressing her etc. Motherhood is not a slideshow of picture perfect moments. It is scary, hard, beautiful, miraculous and frustrating all at the same time. A shower of emotions here and there.

My journey to motherhood is my story with my daughter. I am weak and imperfect. I know I am not the first mother who feel overwhelmed  and challenged but reality bites and you can never bite it back. I just need to push a bit more to become a better wife, better mom and a better woman. Not because the society said so but because that’s what I wanted.